she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
