chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
