my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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