She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Two words: blizzard sex
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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