dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Randomize
