with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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