She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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