So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
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