How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
