wakey wakey hands off snakey
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
