no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
And then he peed in my hair
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