I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
You are the jesus of drinking
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
