dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
