i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
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