and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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