nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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