thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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