my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
