The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
