she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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