At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
