I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
