Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
