I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
