I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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