I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
