No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
