Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I forget how to act sober
Randomize