I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
