he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
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