and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
