as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Sorry about my life...
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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