Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
