They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
