i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Randomize
