I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
