I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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