Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Randomize
