the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
i dont even know how to be here
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
