He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
