Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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