New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
