he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
