the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
