Your face is a jimmy john
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
