I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
where am i from again
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
