and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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