You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
