I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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