whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
