i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
